Constructive discontent allows differing opinions, paradoxes, conflicts, and dilemmas to come out in the open where they can be used as valuable business tools! Following are some ways you can start here and now in your business to use this powerful strategy for unlocking group intelligence.
Be a centered leader. Talk slowly and calmly without denying emotions and without becoming reactive to them. Change the rhythm of dialogue to allow safe discord and enable creativity to emerge from open minds and hearts.
Stay open, curious, and empathetic. When you lose self-control, others feel unsafe to speak openly and honestly and collaboration is extinguished. Learn from your instinctive anger or resistance instead of protecting your position.
Withhold response and listen harder to maximize understanding and potential opportunity. Look for points of alignment and remember that feelings are facts to the person experiencing them.
Utilize the Emotional Intelligence of the whole group. Encourage each person to share what he or she thinks and feels without judgment. Affirm and encourage others who express alternative opinions so they feel heard and respected.
Ask questions while you advocate for your position. Clearly state your feelings and thinking process and ask others to do the same. Doing this builds trust and understanding in the midst of discord.
Find cooperative possibilities. Look for concrete ways you and the others will benefit by cooperating. Harness the energy of conflict to create better solutions for all involved. To loosen perspectives, you might ask, “What will happen if we don’t work together?”
Speak from personal experience. Share how you learn—or struggle to learn—from this or similar situations. Encourage others to share their experiences. Using this approach can bypass defensive or adversarial positions, generate empathy, and create openness.
Say no when you mean no. Say you don’t know when you don’t know. You can be firm without disrespecting or disregarding others’ rights, views or feelings.
Follow through with your projected or promised outcomes. Be clear about any commitments you make during dialogue and then keep them.
Harness the transformational power of anger.Deeply caring discussions often include passionate conflict and brief flashes of anger; they make conversation alive and real. Anger can spark courage and creativity, correct injustices, stimulate progress and create tremendous productive energy when it is appropriately expressed and channeled.
Being specific about your disappointment in any unmet expectation promotes a more trusting and resilient relationship.
Accept that there will be some who, no matter what you do to reach them, will not be constructive, no matter what. Acknowledge this fact without letting it get to your heart. Accept their attitude, bypass their support for things that matter to you, and move them on to something that does inspire them (and off your team).
Mine the gold of gripes. Get pet peeves out in the open to increase productivity and profitability. Unresolved or ignored frustrations and complaints are killers of personal initiative. People may give up griping, but they don’t give up the gripe.
Can you think of ways to cultivate constructive discontent in your business?
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